it is all amazingly, devastatingly TRUE!

mindless doodles, yeah

2007-05-05T05:18:00.000-07:00

My exitement abut this new layout transcended to my posting quantity, unfortunately, I've got nothing much to write about.

01. went to the dentist; my some of my braces' braces fell off. this resulted with me having a premature brace adjustment.

02. ate halo-halo from Chowking. meh! so expensive! and the halo-halo's so small too! the ice cream tasted great though (am not liking the P15 you have to add to have the ice cream)

03. one of my answers at Yahoo!answers was voted as the *best*! yayness. was encouraged to answer lots more, of course.

04. the Cajucoms, my least favorite relatives, suddenly dropped by after we had dinner. eww. The few times i've told myself to build a better relationship with them, they say something really malicious and i wonder why i even bother.

05. my n70's finally, finally FIXED! hooray!

bitch, please

2007-05-04T05:23:00.000-07:00

Yep, new layout ^___^

and I made it!

well, not quite; I copied the "skeleton" off from a blog skin by ambivalente. err, I didn't aske permission, though. is that bad? *worries* at the very least, I put a credit link to her.

so, my layout: Plastic Fantastic by me. Featuring the Lovely Holga toy camera and some sample pictures. It could e better, but I like it enough. Nice first attempt, I'll say. But hey, I made it; I'm bound to say that ^_^;.

the last word from the last day of April `07

2007-04-30T06:28:00.002-07:00

Ack, totally forgot that it's the last day of the month. I've become quite attached to this idle lifestyle, but I want to have some action too! I'm actually dreaming of my days in my new college. Haha, I know that it's not sure yet, but I've got to be confident to "win"! Or maybe this is already part of the mayabang category? Sigh. There are sooo much to worry about, like

-if I have what it takes to be part of the course
-if I can manage to pass the iffy hard subjects included at the course (like advanced chemistry and calculus)
-if I could become successful in this industry
-if I truly, madly want to really do this, or if I'd one day wake up and realize that this isn't my way at all

see?! this is so, so, so complicated. sighhhh.

in other news
I gave this site a new layout! hurts my eyes though. haha! would someday learn to make my own layouts. whee~

I'm missing "Desperate Housewives" and "Gilmore Girls," which used to be my only links to the TV. "FRIENDS" too. I wanna buy DVDs of said shows, but I'm occupied with Harry's last battle (and my favorite pairing, Ron/Hermione. haha!) as it is. I've figured it out, too; I need to save half my allowance everyday. Easy-Peasy! I'm not taking breaktimes anymore for this. hehe.

Harry Potter

2007-04-30T04:41:00.000-07:00

Apparently, the last installment of the Harry Potter series would be worth P1450.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince was worth P1500 so I shouldn't complain, but it's still horrifyingly expensive! Well at least I got a heads up; July 21 gives me a month to prepare for "battle" (classes would resume on June12, so, using my allowance, I've got 1 month! but I'd have to exclude weekends in the computation, so...).

There's no denying it, though, 2007 is a BIG year for Harry Potter. It's the only year that a book and a movie's going to be shown at the same year. And it's The End too. I've anticipated for this time ever since I've been a fan. It's been a long time, but at the same time, it'll be a hard goodbye. Sometimes, I have these "what if JK Rowling had an accident before she finishes book 7?" moments, which are kinda morbid, but valid all the same.

I loved the Harry Potter series; some may think that it's about the occult and the seduction of young minds (and not-so-young ones) to the dark arts, but really, magic in that place is more like a background. It's more about friendship and growing up and choosing between the good and the bad. It had been quite a journey, following the ups and downs in the Potterverse, but I'm thankful for being part of the ride.

Now, if only they could lower the pricing...

l'avenir//the future

2007-04-25T19:04:00.001-07:00

So much for eing out of hiatus; ack, I don't know what to write anymore! I haven't written here in my blogspot account in a year, but transferred here instead. Sigh. It seems like nothing exciting comes to my life.

I'm shifting yet again to another course, though. This time, I won't move again. Tarlac is the weirdest place to have an epiphany, especially somethng as life-changing as this. I don't know if people would say that the course is "me" all along or if this is a totally unprecedent move. Well, I never told anyone that I want to pursue the new course, but there are things that you don't notice but when someone says it out loud, it makes total sense, you know?

Or maybe I'm rambling on and on again, as always.

I'm not disclosing my course yet, though. It might jinx it, haha! For some reason, I'm not worried about it. Is it because I can still be cushioned by my curret course if all doesn't go well? Or am I (finally) confident that I can go in? I'm scared of the future, though. It's a very volatile course. Like a friend said, one day I might wake up and realize that I've made a huge mistake.

Therefore do not be axious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. -Matthew 6:34

The future seems so far away.

hiatus no more

2007-04-09T09:24:00.000-07:00

hiatus: a break in something where there should be continuity

woah, almost a year. If this isn't a blog rot, i don't know what is ^_^. probably the meager few who used to go here have stopped long ago. sigh. first year college had been a rough experience for me. I met a lot of great people though, but the emotional baggage (not from them) was horrendous. i still think about those things sometimes.

anyway, a year can make a LOT of difference; i'm on a new school, with new friends and new problems. hay. i resolved last year's biggest inner conflict by hacking it off. kinda like
cutting your arm--which really, really hurts--off, the pain is gone, but you now have a set of new problems without said arm.

random stuff from the top of my head: transferred to diliman. owned a laptop. joined an org. lived at the New House. sold Zabarte House. bought new one. became church-y. became emo (but am trying to lose it again). lost lots of pounds. gained new ones. had new nephews and neices. finally ate Churros. got addicted to holga. reduced being a glutton. acquired braces. had haircuts. had hair cellophaned (did.not.work.). am trying to be a workaholic.
am goint to try a new hobby (photography). had a livejournal account. had new phone. visited HS alma mater. became a worse insomniac.

i promised myself that i'd restore this site again, one day, when my weird, angsty self goes away. i can't believe it took a year, but i guess this is better than never at all, ne? now i think i can even describe myself as happy; i avoided that adjective like the plague for a long, long time. Happy. it has a nice ring to it. i'm going to be one frequently.

I have to go now, though; Real Life awaits.

hiatus~

2006-04-17T20:52:00.000-07:00

well, it's been more than two months since i've written here. *sigh* a couple of catastrophes have happened sinced that crappy February monday. i failed physics, almost failed math14 (whew!), my PC crashed yet again minutes before i finished my comm.II term paper (causing me two rewrite the WHOLE thing), and a lot of other things. well the "a lot of things" all led to me being stuck here in pampanga, and it's safe to say that i am *not* happy with these developments. well, at least my dad didn't disown me or anything, and i even managed to go to my friend egi's swimming party and go malling with my other friend ashley a few times before my exile. seems to me that i'd have to stay here for the whole summer, with the way things are going.

well, this is it. i'm on hiatus. i've been on hiatus for a long time, but i want to make it official. i'll come back one of these days though, once i finish this mess and when i officially get my summer break. i hope all goes well...

crappy monday, lalala~

2006-02-12T20:14:00.000-08:00

*it's really feb 13,2006.12:40 pm*

note: to top it all off, my grammar sucks.

have you ever woken up feeling that a great day is up ahead and nothing can get you down?

well, today, i have woken up in that fashion. so what if i almost became deaf because of my annoying, tinny alarm clock? or that it's bitterly cold, and my breakfast is that yucky bran cereal with ice-cold milk?

IT'S GOING TO BE A GREAT DAY!!!!

not.

well thankfully, i wasn't late, but something worse happened.
our professor finished checking our test papers.

i failed. not just failed, but REALLY bombed. good thing there's a bonus-point exercise. unfortunately, i got the 2nd problem, the one that i don't even know how to answer.

then we were dismissed. we went to the Lomi House to pass time. when we came back to school, i saw mygroupmate's text message: she already went home because she can't find me. i had to do the diagram thing by myself; i don't even know what it looked like.

THEN i remembered that jacob told me that he won't go to school today. he has my photocopy thing. never mind; i just copied the whole thing off Luzsil's copy.

Tereso and I went to the Main Gate to find a photocopy machine; the one in school's broken. we walked for about half an hour, but every place we go to have broken photocopy machines or over-priced. we finally settled for the one with P2.00 per page because we were so tired of walking. we went back to the main gate where the others are waiting for us. Marvine made the schematic diagram for me (thanks! and THAT's what the diagram thing's called).

and so i'm here. crappy day. exams tomorrow. saw something and i just crumbled. hmph! isn't it horrible when you feel like grinning and bearing everything, that's when the worst come to you? this isn't so bad, i guess. i.just.feel.reaaaaaally.crappy.

new layout

2006-02-04T19:53:00.000-08:00

yuck. i haven't written here in a long time. professors have been pelting us with exams and assignments and other stuff. i think that this will go on forever!

well, at least until March 21.

i feel soooo tired!

happy new year!

2006-01-02T22:39:00.000-08:00

and so, my two-week vacation in Metro Manila had officially ended.
we are again back to school.
what happened: (my head hurts. can't think up of complex sentences)
woke up
ate froot loops and milk (separately. long sorty. explain maybe tomorrow)
almost late for class.
teacher was later than me.
had first PE session.
played parlor games; ended in tie with group B
lunch
sat in front of the school with classmates
found out that there aren't any afternoon classes
sat some more
went here @ internet cafe.
about to run out of time.

ciao!

happy holiday!

2005-11-27T16:04:00.000-08:00

after a long, long time, i'm back!
whew! i thought that i'll put off writing here forever; it seems like my blog's in the process of stagnation.

well, now that i'm here... i forgot what to say!

oh yeah, i'm in QC until tomorrow. apparently, there's a holiday thingy on wednesday, but it was moved on monday (tomorrow). i forgot what for; i'm horrible at dates.

that's all for now!

oh yeah, i watched "harry potter and the goblet of fire" with ashley, who spent the night at her brother's school (philippine science HS), in SM fairview. the movie was soooo long, but it was okay. SM fairview looked a LOT better than i remembered. hope i can stay for a few hours in SM North Edsa tomorrow. pampanga malls are too small for me :P

back in manila

2005-10-10T15:06:00.000-07:00

yeah! i'm back here in QC!

why do i always end up like this? why do i ALWAYS forget what i'm going to type whenever i'm in fron of the PC? argh! since my creative side shrivelled up (must be because of all those hours spent staring at the TV. would you believe that i haven't eaten breakfast because i've watched TV since i woke up and forgot to eat?!), i'm just going to write random things that happened to me in bulleted form.

-got exempted from nat. sci exam (yey!)
-gave up studying for OTHER exams (*sobs*)
-got bummed out last thursday; had a movie marathon (5 movies) and bought 4 books
-grandma had a stroke; aunts flocked in my house, which stank (because of the stinkball aka my nephew Lenard. yeah, without an O)so i locked myself up in my room
-grandma got better. in fact her spooky stuttering voice is gone & she became more talkative
-went to Nepo mall
-got home yesterday
-got bored.
-is praying to be allowed to go at the einstein 4 get-together
-is now chatting with mai2 via yahoo! messenger

THOSE and other stuff.

hope this break'll be fun.

ta-ta!

last

2005-09-09T15:37:00.000-07:00

Your Birthdate: January 12

Being born on the 12th day of the month (3 energy) is likely to add a good bit of vitality to your life.
The energy of 3 allows you bounce back rapidly from setbacks, physical or mental.
There is a restlessness in your nature, but you seem to be able to portray an easygoing, sometimes "couldn't care less" attitude.

You have a natural ability to express yourself in public, and you always make a very good impression.
Good with words, you excel in writing, speaking, and possibly singing.
You are energetic and always a good conversationalist.

You have a keen imagination, but you tend to scatter your energies and become involved with too may superficial matters.
Your mind is practical and rational despite this tendency to jump about.
You are affectionate and loving - but very sensitive.
You are subject to rapid ups and downs.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

obviously, i'm bored

2005-09-09T15:33:00.000-07:00

In a Past Life...

You Were: A Charming Fortune Teller.

Where You Lived: Alaska.

How You Died: Natural causes.

Who Were You In a Past Life?

Your Japanese Name Is...

Ren Watanabe

What's your Japanese Name?

You are a Self-Discoverer

You're not religious, but you've created your own kind of spirituality.
Introspective and thoughtful, you tend to look inward for the divine.
You are distrusting of all forms of organized religion.
You especially dislike religious gurus and leaders, who you feel are charlatans.

What's Your Religious Philosophy?

Your Personality Profile

You are dependable, popular, and observant.
Deep and thoughtful, you are prone to moodiness.
In fact, your emotions tend to influence everything you do.

You are unique, creative, and expressive.
You don't mind waving your freak flag every once and a while.
And lucky for you, most people find your weird ways charming!

The World's Shortest Personality Test

ninth day of september

2005-09-09T15:14:00.000-07:00

okay, i have spent my last 20 bucks to write here, but i have nothing whatsoever to write about. nothing interesting anyway. hmmmmm... i'm currently thinking up of ways to make my father agree to buy me a mini coopre. *well* that's pretty ambitious of me to ask (especially since i like the 2003 edition), but it *is* my gift for passing in UP (though not the UP he and i were thinking of, but he didn't specifically say diliman), and he won't buy me a car at the agreed-upon date (anywhere near january 12. 2006---my 18th birthday in case you didn't know) so he can buy this house he likes. argh! i miss having internet in my house. y'know the song, "wake me up when september ends"? it applies to me. at least the title does, because october's our sem break! i need to get away from this place. pampanga's okay, but it's not QC, y'know? besides, my brain's shriveling. i need a change of scenery.

noisy wednesday

2005-08-31T17:00:00.000-07:00

i wanna pee.

i should've gone straight home from our "practice" at jenny's house.
well, we did practice a bit, but it consists mostly of waiting for the others and watching TV. oh, let's not forget the junk food eating session. this is the first time that i was EARLY for a practice, so it's quite an achievement.

ihave now acquired a new pastime; renting movies. yay. a new diversion from my acads! my dad will kill me! at least, i can breathe a bit easier now; i passed my secong math exam! *does mental cartwheels* and i also passed the second nat. sci. exam, even though it's just a 3.0; i haven't studied for it, and i prayed reeeeeaaaally hard to have that 3.0. this week's been great, i guess.it's like the sunshine after a particularly rough storm. i hope i can move to diliman, but i doubt it; i neither have strong connections nor great grades.

i want a car!

it's so friggin' noisy here! it's a mixture of rock songs and gun blasts (people here still like counter strike; i thought it got out of fashion years ago). this is not helping my bladder. i cannot think. i wanna have a 2.0 average, though i know that i don't deserve it. my brain has now gone...

blank.

hiatus

2005-08-18T12:35:00.000-07:00

haven't written here for a pretty long time, and so that this blog won't rot ang decay like my previous journals, i decided to write.

*yawn!* i've been sleep-deprived these past few days. No, it's not that my insomnia's back; i just can't face the fact that the day's ending and i try to sleep reaaally late, ignoring my body's urge to sleep. i hate mornings. i hate the heat and the light. i hate the fact that i'm bored, and the only constructive thing i can do is STUDY, one of the things i hate to do. college is hard. i mean, quesci's hard too, but at least i can afford to not study, because in the back of my mind, i know that there's always tomorrow. yeah, i procrastinate. i hate loitering around as much as studying, though, so i'm always in a quandary on what to do, and i end up doing nothing. argh! how come upperclassmen make it look like college is a breeze? before, i thought the whole point of college is the freedom; malling here, arcades there, y'know? or maybe it's just because i'm in pampanga... i just realized the other day that EVER is bigger than Nepo (that's the biggest mall that's easily accesible to me here; SM's too far and expensive). argh!!!!

one of my neighbors here died the other day. it was freaky, because my dad just bought the kid's family's PC last saturday so they'll have money to treat her sickness (i'm assuming that it's a girl; haven't seen her; my dad's friend--another neighbor-- said that her face is puffed up or sumthin' like that). The PC's on my dad's friend's house, though. i dunno what their plan is about it. poor kid! and her grandpa had a heart attack last sunday. we thought he's the dead one.

i'm gonna have an mp3 player! yay! my mom goofed up though, and didn't buy the zen one. oh well. i just hope i get a 2.0 average this sem, though it's rather unlikely, as most of my professors are sadists when it comes to grade-giving (as one of them loves to point out, a grade of 3.0 is earned by blood, sweat, and tears).

freezing in the library

2005-07-29T10:30:00.000-07:00

i don't think i can stand this any longer; I'M FREEZING!!!! why do i have to be the one who gets the PC near the aircon? oh well. the sacrifices you have to do for an hour of net surfing. at least it beats getting shouted at by the grouchy librarian (i dunno what's up with her; marius said she used to be really nice) for talking too loud. y'see, thereare three things that you can do at the UPEPP library:

1. surf the net
2. magpalamig
3. talk!

the third one usually gets people int trouble... sometimes the librarian just barks at the nearest group of people just for kicks. argh! my fingers are starting to get numb... there are four people using the library's internet access, and they all happen to be my blockmates in Comm. I. our next class is, like, 3 hours away! yay! see, our Comm. prof has a migraine and dismissed us early; our next prof (history class) is hovering somewhere in luzon (i think she's the one in UST? nah. that's the PE prof), then it's our lunchtime! yeah! some of our blockmates will come to school after lunch, i think.

---------------

i am currently in a dilemma, but since i am such a lazy bum, i don't payattention to it that much. i'm talking about that blasted "classmate descriptions" job that my dad shoved to me because i'm the only one he can boss around who can do it. see, the people who are supposed to do those darn descriptions screwed up, so our yearbook can't be printed yet. This means that it's kinda ous section's fault why the yearbook release is taking so darn loooong.

i feel a bit guilty about it; see i posted something about it on friendster with a bit of a bitter edge... there's a person who told me that he'll help, and i thought he's one of the people who'll ignore my plea... sometimes, people who you've known for the longest time can *really* surprise you. like that time my rocker friend frances nonchalantly told me that she used to deance ballet... that is so, sooooo weird! haha!

I WANNA WATCH "CHARLIE AND THE CHOCOLASTE FACTORY!"

there. i said it.

i already have the latest HP, but not in book form.

i am now likely to drop Math 11... i hope not!!! argh!! why do i have to be such a dunce in math?! i used to think that college is a breeze compared to high school... why do teachers from quesci keep telling us that xientians do really well in college? maybe it is, but i'm just not paying attention. it's kinda weird that i only have 6 subjects, but i am stressed out. i need to study!!!! argh!!!!

harry potter and the half-blood prince

2005-07-16T15:05:00.000-07:00

realease ng baghong HP today...

pinagbawalan akong bumili.

and it's not because of something like "it erodes christianity to the soul," like the new pope said.

wala lang, trip lang tatay ko.

how cruel can you get?

my hand-eye-brain coordination is out of whack today.
this week is a bit horrible, but i won't spill in the details.

i wanna hurl.

yesterday...

2005-07-01T14:00:00.000-07:00

nakakatuwa lang kahapon.
kaya nag-post ako.
after 1 month ng pagiging college, napagtanto ko na may bestfriend na ko sa high school!

ewan kun bakit, pero the thought of it makes me cringe.

nag text marathon kami ni roda, at dahil depressed ako, kung anu-anong ka-ewanan ang pinagtatanong ko sa kanya. yung bang mga di niya masasagot. parang, pano mo malalaman na crush mo ang isang tao, eh wala naman yung crush!

tapos si ashley, sinabi na rin sakin ang kanyang crush. medyo angsty ngayon yung taong yun, at depressed ako, kaya nagreklamo kami sa isa't-isa tungkol sa aming love life. or more acurately, our lack of one. grabe ang adik nun! magtext ba naman ng, "why do we fall for the wrong guy?" naisip ko tuloy, si Ashley ba yun?! akala ko ako lang ang irasyonal at mareklamo sa mga friendly friends ko. kahit nga si egi na may love life hindi ngumangawa ng ganyan! hehe. yun lang.

dreary day...

2005-06-30T13:55:00.000-07:00

my post title (as you can't see) is "dreary day," but it's not actually that bad. sure, my mind is chanting "sheer torture!" while we danced chacha on PE, and my dance partner keeps on saying "it's so hot" in a weird british accent (just my luck; dino-my partner-and i both don't know how to dance), but it's okay. it's just that dancing ain't mah thang! pero in fairness, nakukuha ko na yung sayaw! the practice at jenny's house helped a lot. speaking of things that happened yesterday, joseph et. al. had a naruto marathon, and and jacob told me a bit of what happened (in the show; i dunno if their overnight plans actually happened) while our history prof was thinking about the next thing she'll say (believe me, that's long. she does this really distracting ummmmmmmmmmmmmm sound).

okay i think what i wrote was kinda confusing, so i'll put here my sched for the day:

8:30-10:00- soc. sci.
10:00-12:00- PE

PE is horrible, in the sense that we look stupid (after cha-cha, we had this weird dance whose name i forgot. basta we look like gays or something. i like the kadena de amor, though) and sweaty. i mean 2 hours with an exuberant instructor?! fortunately, he dismissed us kinda early. good; i was at the brink of dehydration.

then, we stayed at...i don't know what it's name is, but it looks like a tambayan. my blockmates joked about making an organization of our own, so that the orgs ang frats won't pester us anymore. we're the UP BABES! (UP Bachelor of Arts Bus. Economics students! yeah) haha! i dunno if they're serious, though. jenny and i stayed at the kappa HQ. two of the members said that i was too quiet. yes, i am now "the quiet girl," believe it or not. haha.

netopia...

2005-06-27T13:02:00.000-07:00

huhuhu...

iniwan na ko ni jenny...

puro mga boys n lang kasama ko...

aden.chito.jacob.jd.joseph.marius.

counter sila.

internet ako.

nagcut ung 2 matanda.

tapos na klase namin.

motorcade dapat ngayon, wala namang motor.

sabi nga ni jp, mahihirap lang talaga ang mga econ.

pero sa diliman, mga may sariling kompanya ang econ people.

ngayon ko lang naisip, wala pala akong kasamang umuwi.

naruto marathon kina joseph sa wednesday.

overnight din sila.

10 years na kaming magkakilala ng bespren ko.

hapi bertdei sa kanya.

Hannah Elizabeth Patriarca y Chua.

hapi balik-eskwela sa isa ko pang friend:

Karissa Irene Pena y Topacio.

birthday pala ng ex-classmate kong si marlo.

ayan, la na kong masulat.

may crush na ko sa peyups! nyahahaha!!!
di ko alam name eh.

lunchtime interlude

2005-06-16T11:53:00.000-07:00

bat ganun, nawala na ata ang aking kakayanang magsulat sa wikang inggles?

okay, so as usual, i am here in drew's cafe, the place that is starting to shape up as my "tambayan." not that i'm complaining (well, not much...); horrible things will arise if i actually have an internet at home. i wouldn't get to study, and i'm crammed with undone assignments as it is. we also have an exam (yes, on my second week of school)on math, which needs "creativity." basically, you need to do some major hocus-pocus. i am slowly starting to remember how to study.

at last, i finally found someone who lives in Dau! the problem is, he's my weirdo classmate, and i always forget his name. i think he's weird because he keeps saying i'm serious, and because he's really weird. i dunno how to explain it, though.

oh yeah, i got lost yesterday.

i watched naruto, spongebob, and supergals at the same time yesterday, and managed to get the gist of each show. that's my version of multitasking O_o;

kumain kami ng taho kanina. libre ni hakob. kaso anliit! basta, P5, mukhang tig-P3. wala ang Soc Sci teacher namin, kaya tumambay na lang kami sa labas.

medyo nagui-guilty ako sa isang bagay, pero di ako ang may kasalanan. di naman ako ang lumapit eh... okey naman ngayon ang buhay. nawawala ang relo ko. YEHEY! i don't like my watch that much; kamukha yun nung relo ng crush ko nung grade 4; mas girlie nga lang. gets mo? parang pambata! pero ibibili naman daw ako ng aking ama ng bago eh. sana kasama ako para makapili naman ako ng gusto ko.

gusto ko sanang maglakwatsa sa jenra (basta, mall siya dito sa mabalacat), kaso nga lang may kasama nga ako. alangan namang yayain ko yun! gusto kong mag-mcdo!

oh lala!

2005-06-10T15:13:00.000-07:00

Per a British medical journal report, the fungi that feed on old paper may be mildly hallucinogenic, and the "fungal hallucinogens" may cause an "enhancement of enlightenment" in readers. The source of creative inspiration for many great authors through history may have been a quick sniff of moldy books, causing them to get high.

not very long ago, i told someone that i like old books because i like their smell. does that mean...that i'm an addict?! noooooooooo!!!

i'm here in school, btw. weird day. my parents are coming later. i just wish they've brought TV. at last, i found someone (two, actually) that watches naruto: jacob and joseph! sheesh, i already texted and asked people (some of them watches full house instead, though they own CDs of the whole series), and it turns out that my two blockmates watch it.cge, time ko na ata. ta-ta!

aiiii... birthday pala ni Molly bukas! happy birthday, though you won't see this message because you don't even know that i have a blog! :D

funk me!

2005-06-07T14:29:00.000-07:00

yeah! it's my first day of school,in the library. woah! there's internet here! as in in school... bongga!

well so much for starting the year with a blast... naligaw ako kaninang umaga, naglakad ng pagkalayo-layo, naligaw ulit (sa school naman... ang weird anliit-liit lang nitong campus naligaw pa ko...hehe), at nagkaroon ng blisters. actually, di na siya blister...sugat na siya. may tapyas na ang paa ko...yuck! well at least nakarating ako on time, at kasama ko si lovely sa COMM I (long story, basta nakilala ko siya dati). masaya teacher namin... she sounds like Ms. Hermano, my third year class adviser, siguro kasi may exposure sila sa ibang bansa. sa History, kasama ko sina Jacob at Joseph. nakatira na si Jacob kina Joseph, at ginagawa namang utusan ni Joseph si Jacob, pero okey lang kay Jacob kasi baka palayasin daw siya. Terror daw yung teacher namin sa History, na walang nakakaalam ng pangalan, dahil ayaw niyang sabihin. mukha namang mabait, pero maswerte ka na daw pag binigyan ka niya ng 3. Sabi yan ni Jenny, na nalilink kay Joseph. Basta magulo sila. tapos lunchtime, kasama ko yung dalawa, nagchowking kami. they already finished their lunch long before my order came, pero mabait naman yung dalawa at hinintay ako. kaso medyo nakaka-OP kasi puro Detroit pinag-uusapan nila! as in ung basketball team? Eh mejo may hostile feelings ako sa BBall ngayon dahil...basta! tapos nung papunta na kaming school, umulan, pero lumusong (tama ba?) na lang kami. nilibre kami ni Jos sa jeep. yeah! pagdating namin, tinawag ako ni Lovely, tapos sila kasama ko, sila ni cristina. kasi nag-CR nanaman si Jacob. feel ko may UTI yun, nakaka-lima na ata siyang CR before Math started. late math teacher namin, pero masay naman. mabait! siya yung teacher na alam yung Quesci. Dr. daw siya, pero dahil kulang ako ng Common sense, muntik ko nang itanong kung ba't siya nagtuturo ng math, eh doktor siya. nako ambobo! buti na lang naisip ko just in time. yun ang subjects ko as of now. may nakita kasi akong kaklase, si Marvin, na nagcocomputer, kaya na-engganyo na rin ako. ansaya dito! mabait ang mga nasa library! tsaka maganda yung PC, hindi katulad ng ibang schools diyan na 5 million ang budget... in fairness may internet din sa kisay.

ay, si jacob talaga, grabe ang aura! sobra ang hatak! may fans club na agad! hehe... di naman fans club, pero madami na ang may type sa kanya. may kakilala nga akong isa... ayaw naman niyang maniwala, feel niya linoloko lang namin siya. na-amaze ako; first day pa lang ah! so nagkatotoo ang hula ng mga tao. hay nako, english nila ngayon ni Joseph, kaya wala akong kasama. si Lovely umuwi na. si cristina, history. sinamahan nga niya ako kanina dito sa library eh, pero umalis na siya. kaya ngayon, ka-chika ko si Marvin. nako. mental block na ko. over and out!

back to civilization

2005-06-01T15:51:00.000-07:00

yeah! i'm back...but not for long, though. i haven't kept my promise to email someone, but it's okay.

dito ulit ako sa internetan. syempre, pinutol ng tatay ko telepono namin eh. tsaka nasa gitna ng lahar PC ko. actually, okey naman pala ang pampanga... tahimik yung village namin, as in parang ghost town! kung minsan, naririndi na ko, kaya lumalabas akong bahay at linalakad ang anim na blokeng pagitan ng aking bahay at ng highway. sa loob ng dalawang araw, lalayas na naman ako, papuntang MINDORO. okey naman yung bahay ng lola ko, kaso i hate ships! lalo na this ship in particular... M/S Ruby. wag niyo lang sabihin kay roda yan, dahil ipinangalan yung mabaho at kalawanging barkong yon sa kapatid niya, ehehe.

di ko ma-explain yung bagong bahay. basta okei lang sya, kaso, mejo musty yung smell, tsaka kadiri yung kubeta. kulay yellow pa! as in lemon yellow, tapos dilaw din yung ilaw, kaya ansakit sa mata. hindi mukhang bahay yung bahay...it's so...dead. tsaka mukhang panahon yung ambience, at parang nung 1945 huling nagkatao dun (pero exaggerated yan. itinayo yung bahay nung 1960s). nagri-ring sa aking tenga ang tanong ni Roda (birthday din niya nung May 30).

"di ka ba takot sa mumu?"

so, hinalughog ko ang bahay. di ko naman feel na haunted xa, kahit na bumukas mag-isa yung window ko, pero yung kapartner niya di naman gumalaw. hehehe. wala ding tubig yung bahay, at kung di pundido yung ilaw, brownout. pina-iigib na lang kami nung kapit-bahay namin, si Tito Wilson, na kumpare ng aking ama. dun sa may hindi kalayuan ang tahanan ng aking mga pinsan.

napakatagalog ko ngayon! wala ng time para mag-inggles.

enrollment ko kahapon. Yeah! pumasa ako sa test at hindi na ko mage-english I. diretso na kosa Communication Arts. Block B ako, at kasama ko sina Jacob at Joseph. basta, kasi pumila kami, tapos may ale na nagpaupo sa akin sa tabi niya. chinika niya ako sa kapangpangan, tapos pinakilala niya ko sa anak niyang si Jenny Rose. Kamukha niya si Penelope sa side view, sa front view, kamukha niya ang grade school classmate ko na si Antoinette Delmo. eniwei, kami magkasama buong araw, tapos medyo narinig ng tatay ni Jacob yung sales pitch niy Jenny, kaya B din xa. At dahil friends and double J (hirap mag-type!), B na rin si Joseph. tapos they ushered us into this room. by five ang pasok, kaya magkakasama kaming apat, plus yung isang lalake na mukhang mama's boy (hehe). tapos pakilala-kilala. nagkahiwalay kami dun sa english enlistment, at somehow, di ko na nakita yung dalawang lalake. dumating na rin pala yung barkada ni Jenny, si Dani. bago ko siya makilala akala ko kamukha sya ni egi, kasi mukhang Penelope si Jenny. hehe. di naman. may nakilala din akong iba, tapos, astig, may isang Prof na alam ang Kisay! as in Kisay ang tawag niya dun!

tapos masakit na kamay ko. ayoko sa mindoro. laitan na naman.

"tumaba ka!"
"tingnan niyo si Christine, ang tangkaaad! di katulad ni..."
"ba't ka nag-economics?! dapat nag-Accounting ka, naririnig mo?! ACCOUNTING!!"

that's my family. very tactful. yung last part, laging ipinagduduldulan ng pinsan kong lawyer. hmph! at least ako hindi kalbo! nyahahaha!

internet place...from now on

2005-05-23T14:36:00.001-07:00

i'm kinda bummed out.
i think i shall be forever be stuck in internet places.
i got sick (for thew third time this summer, i might add).
then, after i kinda recovered, i found out that our phone lines were cut off.
this means two things:
1. i can't talk with anyone outside of my family members
2. i can't surf the net at home
my dad didn't allow me to go to the mall with Ashley.
today is totally boring, which annoys me the most.

you see, it's not supposed to be boring! i actually had something constructinve to do today, but my dad didn't allow me. "masyado kang naglalakwatsa ngayon," he said! hah! does three trips to the hospital look exciting?! that's what's taking up most of the time this summer, catching fevers. And i've been somewhere i actually wanted to go to this summer only once, and that was about two weeks ago. My dad said that i'll have a phone in pampanga; anu'ng silbi nun? who'll i call there? then, i'll return here in QC in june 2. please like i wanna go! this is a total joke; i'll just spend the remainder of my vacation worrying about that stupid trip in mindoro (june3-4; then i'll go back in pampanga on June 5). Then, when just as i am about to start recuperating from sea-sickness brought to me by that darn trip to mindoro, surprise, surprise.

it's my first day in college!

okay, i am sooo not thinking logically here, so i'll stop. what's the use of planning your life when it always spins out of control just when you're thinking that everything's going to be okay?

and why is my dad always dragging me to see people i don't want to see, and pulling me away to people that i do?

internet place...from now on

2005-05-23T14:36:00.000-07:00

sundays

2005-05-17T19:13:00.000-07:00

(note: dahil mejo na-bore na ko sa bulleted blog entries at di ko alam kung pano mag-start ng entry, ginawa ko nalang `tong mejo narrative. This happened last sunday...PS, di ko na alam kung anung date ngayon, kaya na-shock akong malaman na aalis na ako sa NCR next week. oh la la!)

ring,ring!

"Carmina sagutin mo yung telepono!" my dad hollered. He always thinks that every call's for him, and he's avoiding some of his customers.

"sandali lang!" i hollered back, so he'd hear me. i snapped back to reality, ignored the show currently playing on TV, and walked lazily out of the room. It's Sunday night, and as usual, my dad and I are watching TV---at different rooms. He's in the living room, watching boxing, and i am on our room (yes, i share a room with my parents. either that or i sleep in the living room. or outside of our house). I'm the unofficial phone answerer in our house, because I am usually glued in front of the computer, so i am the nearest one on the phone. I don't really mind the job, except when my dad's annoying clients calls (not all of them are,though, but some are really annoying, like this Freddie guy who called up our house and pestered me instead, because my dad was out of the house).

riiing!

i went out of the room, and my dad was looking at me expectantly. I picked up the phone.

"hello?"

"hello ka dyan! may ibang tao dyan, di nagrereply sa text..." a familiar, but a little muffled voice greeted me. it took a few moments to register on my mind who it was. And finally, i've returned to my senses.
"Hannah?! abah napatawag ka! alam mo pala number ko?" i looked at my dad, and said, "si hannah `to." He resumed to his boxing match.
"loka! memorized ko kaya! wala lang, wala kasing magawa dito eh..."
"Hmph! ganyan naman lagi! tinatawagan mo lang ako pag bored ka!" i joked, "Ba't ang hina ng boses mo?"
"nasa ospital kasi ako eh..."
"ANOH?! bakit? anong nangyari?"
"sira! lola ko nandito."
i heaved a sigh of relief, thankful because i don't have a friend with leukemia or something bad. i was about to ask if her grandma's dead or something, but i know she'll kill me.
"ermmm...kamusta lola mo?"
"di ako pwedeng magkwento dito"
"ano?"
"di ako pwedeng magkwento dito!"
"bakit?"
"basta...di mo ba nareceive text ko?"
"pasenxa! buong araw kasi nakapatay cell ko eh!"
"buksan mo!"

i ran back to our room, and frantically searched for my cell. no luck. i ran to my mom, "
Nay! nakita niyo cell ko?"
"hindi,"
i ran back to the phone.

"Nawawala cell ko eh!" i cheerily replied.
"ay, ambot,"

oh well. then we chatted a little while, our conversation punctured with my "ano'ng sabi mo?" because her voice was so low and i'm a little deaf. of course, we talked about karissa ("sinulatan ka kaya niya!" "di kaya! dine-deny nga nia yung e-mail address niya eh!" "alin, yung kp_wildandjazzy?" "oo!" "iba na kaya!"), abbout Center for Pop Music ("sasama ka sa summer camp?" anu'ng summer camp?" "yung sa laguna?"), about Seed people (Seed was my school in Elementary. hindi yan buto), about UST ("nakuha ko na sched ko! wala akong breaktime!"), and about her newest dilemma. the usual stuff. She then made me do some sleuthing (which i haven't done yet, because i am currently addicted to Tradewinds2), which i refused to do at first, but because she thinks that it'll ruin her college mood, i decided to help her out. Agh! i wouldn't be too concerned if i were her; i'd be even HAPPY! :) the more the merrier, right?

she then has to go; her brother has to call someone (i think), and it's getting late. I was quite surprised that my dad didn't make me hang up the phone; it's really embarrassing when he does that; my correspondent can hear every curse and bellow he utters.

I then returned to our room, watch "Joey," and looked for my cell. Found it! it fell off my bed. the three shows i watch on sundays have the sae....ummm...themes. don't ask what it is. then, we watched the grand finals for this singing thingy on the main television. My dad got pissed off because they kept singing, and turned off the TV. we all retreated to our rooms. My dad watched the grand finals in our room.

THE END.

well, other things happened, but it's kinda muddled. we did't go to church though, because of my horrible headache (though it's not a headache, exactly. only the left part of my head hurts). my grandma made ube. my mom bought this lurid pink skirt that i'm planning to wear when i meet with Ashley (i'll tell her to wear her skirt too. hehe. girly! no one'll see me so it's okay. i hope Frances wouldn't condemn us. OMG! i forgot to ask frannie and sarah if they wanna come with us!). I talked with Ashely, and asked her how to ask my dad to allow me to go to SM with her. I also asked if she wants to watch "Kingdom of Heaven." ummm... she didn't, and i didn't too (sorry, ron-ron!). i'm kinda scared to ask my dad permission to go out; most of the time he doesn't let me. so, i asked Ash if we could go to SM (or Ever) on thursday instead. She agreed, i called ron, and asked if he'd be free on Thursday. he can't go. oh. oh well. as usual, i planned something, kinda get laxed about it and do it halfway, and on the day before the event, i panic, and hope that things will come through. hope Sarah and Frances can come.

huh?

2005-05-11T17:22:00.000-07:00

Your Icecream Flavour is...Neopolitan!

You aren't satisfied with just one flavor. They say variety is the spice of life and this shines through in your Ice cream of choice! Just don't eat all the chocolate and leave the strawberry and vanilla behind!

What is your Icecream Flavour?

Find out at Go Quiz

You scored as Cinderella. Your alter ego is Cinderella! You often find yourself doing a lot of housework, but if you are patient, your hard work usually pays off. You are prone to losing things, so dont rush through everything.

Cinderella

81%

Peter Pan

75%

Goofy

63%

Sleeping Beauty

56%

Ariel

44%

Donald Duck

44%

Cruella De Ville

44%

Pinocchio

38%

The Beast

31%

Snow White

19%

Which Disney Character is your Alter Ego?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Spanish. You should learn Spanish. It can be useful especially if you live in the United States.

Latin

80%

Spanish

80%

Japanese

67%

Chinese

60%

Arabic

53%

French

47%

English

What language should you learn?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Dior.

Dior

100%

Abercrombie & Fitch

83%

Diesel

75%

Anna Sui

75%

Chanel

75%

Burberry

58%

Tommy Hilfiger

58%

Gucci

58%

DKNY

42%

Louis Vuitton

33%

What Designer Brand Are You?
created with QuizFarm.com

bwahahahaha

2005-05-11T16:54:00.000-07:00

The University of Blogging

Presents to
charm

An Honorary
Bachelor of
Bad Poetry

Majoring in
Color Bars

Signed
Dr. GoQuiz.com

Blogging Degree
From Go-Quiz.com

can't get enough of this blog thing

2005-05-11T15:09:00.000-07:00

Looking at other people's blogs and catching up with friends made me kind of feel that I am the only one not doing anything constructive this summer.

Alvin-helps out at their shop; plays PS2 with his older brother, who also graduated this year

Felix-PS2 with his cousins; goes to a sing/dance/act workshop, here he'll play the Phantom at The Phantom of the Opera

Ron-karate with Hannah; probably gearing up for his birthday

Roda-cross stitches with her younger siblings; does movie marathons with her whole family

Grace-busy with enrollment and stuff; does a hundred push-ups everyday (this is the one that most amazes me; I mean, i can't even do a single push-up)

Dia-scouting for schools (She already passed PLM, but I don't know if she'll study there)

Egi- Goes out a lot...she knows much about the happenings on our batchmates' lives, though i dunno who her informant is

Ashley- went to Leyte; she'sback to civiliztion now, though.

oh well. I don't know what's happening with my other classmates and friends, though I think they're doing well. Most of us already have schools. Many are scampering off to fulfill their new alma mater's recquirements. As for me, nothing much is happening, though the annoying feeling of boredom has left me, and the urge to bang my head on the wall (and to jump off high places) already ceased.

Sunday
-went to church
-almost had a haircut (out of sheer boredom), but my mom stopped me
-made frantic arrangements to hang out at Egi's house; we decided to meet at Mcdonald's ("Bawal ma-late," Roda texted)
-watched "Pinoy Pop Superstar Grandfinals" `til 1am the next day; T. Eman's there (he sang) but I didn't see him

Monday
-My dad woke me up; gave me a hundred bucks
-my mom called to ask if i already ate (i fibbed and said yes); she told me to fish out a hundred bucks from her hiding place
-mulled a bit and watched "Martin Mystery," then realized that i haven't eaten yet, because my grandma said so
-ate Milo with rice; took a bath
-frantically looked for my stuff; didn't find most of it; shoved my "essentials" at the nearest bag and fled
-was late for a sew minutes; Felix was already there, Roda wasn't. We changed seats a lot; saw a few batchmates
-11:00 Roda's an hour late; Edpat sat with us, and suggested that we watch horror flicks ("Texas Chainsaw Massacre!" i said, because it's the only non-asian horror flick i remember as of the moment); i was a bit exuberant, making roda ask if it was the first time i've been out of the house
-went to SM;lingered about at the video store
-went to Egi's house; we rode a non-air conditioned bus---my first time without adult supervision. I was giddy, and i think a few people were looking at us (i was pretty loud)
-arrived at Egi's; she's not home. her kid sister let us in; we watched TV, and i kept shouting,"Cable!"
-she arrived, whith her brother in tow. He immediately disappeared out of sight, which he always does whenever we're at their house
-Egi said i looked different. "Gumanda ako?" i asked, and after staring at me for a few moments, she said yes. I gloated for a few minutes
-there where about 12 chessboards at their house; felix and i texted Alvin straightaway about it
-We went at Egi's Family's bedroom, where there's aircon ("aircon buong bahay namin, tsaka lahat ng TV namin may cable! anim na TV yun," Alvin bragged at me the next day. hmph.); Mika, Egi's sis, went with us
-We jumped in their bed and were grabbed as much pillows as we can; egi served us lunch, popcorn, and ice candy, though not precisely in that order
-We watched "Little Black Book." Felix slept at the middle of it. At the end, we didn't understand much of the movie
-They plugged on one of Roda's Videoke CDs (much to Mika's chagrin, because she wants to watch more); Felix sang. Mika disrupts his performance; we try to stop her
-We sang. Mika insisted that she sings "A Whole New World" and "Beauty and the Beast," but it turns out that she can't read
-My dad called. I was past my curfew (we arrived at 1 pm; my curfew's 2pm). My dad ordered that i go home. we compromised, and he'll fetch me at Books for Less
-went home after a few more songs; we rode a bus, but something's wrong with it, so we rode another one
-Roda was first to get out of the bus; Felix, taking pity on me (i'm scared of stairs, and i have to cross an overpass) went with me to SM
-Got to Books for Less; my dad's not there; i saw this Coffee Table book about Norman Rockwell. It was pretty cool, and he's now my favorite artist
-went home after 2 hours

Tuesday
-singing lessons; T. Eman said my voice got higher (yeah), and he said i'm ready to sing songs (all i did up to this point is "Ma Mo Ma Mo Ma" and "Mmmmmmm" and other things you can do with "m")
-My first song (Ahem): "Mary Had A Little Lamb." It's so hard! I didn't know that "MHAHL" was so high-pitched; my teacher and i don't remember the whole song, so whe stopped at the 2nd verse
-Told my mom that i'm going to buy my dad a gift; she dropped me off at books for less
-read about Norman Rockwell; my dad came and i bought the book
-he asked what i bought. He caught me peeling off the tag price. "Mahal siguro yan kaya inaalis mo ang presyo," he leered. i gave it to him and told him that it's my birthday gift. He stared at me. It was freaky, and i was ready to jump out of our vehicle and start running when he said thanks. Then he told me that he was thinking that i never give him gifts as he was driving to fetch me (which is, i think, a tad unfair of him to think because i do give him gifts. In fact, his current wallet came from me)

guess who's back

2005-05-11T14:29:00.000-07:00

bwaharharharha!guess who's back...back again?

me!

hmmmm... that sounds kinda power hungry...oh well...

i haven't been here since that darn fever i had. Ever since then, i've been succumbed into a depression that i can't shake off; for weeks i was sluggish, melancholic, and very, very bored. I hated everything on TV (if it isn't a rerun, it's a telenovela, or feuding religious groups), i don't wanna eat anything (which iskind of a good thing, as i've shed a few pounds), i'm not allowed to go out of our house, and my internet card ran out (nooooo!)... everything seems gray and dull... i really don't wanna wake up in the morning, because i know that my day will consist of waiting for 8 pm to come, so i can sleep and forget about everything, even for a few hours. The most exciting part of my day is when we turn on the aircon. i realized that one day, and that is when i knew that my life is rapidly resembling a a rag.

then, poof! it became Koko Krunch! <---haha! ayaw maging corny eh!

aherm...as i was saying... the dark cloud hovering about me these past few weeks seems to be gone. The realization hit me as i was watching Martin Mysteries, of all shows. Oh well. I'm back to my dangerously exuberant and loud self. All's right in the world. :)

sluggy sunday

2005-04-24T12:36:00.000-07:00

i feel sooo sluggish. It's hot, i have a cough and a runny nose, and almost everyone in our house has a disease of some sort. I feel like sleeping, but I am fighting the lethargy for some reason. I wanna go to school, but i don't have a really good reason for my dad o allow me. I kinda want to a) get my pics (our pictures are reportedly hideous) b) watch a movie (what movie? ANY movie! I'm even willing to watch "the wedding date") c) see what happens to my school during summer. Unfortunately, those reasons aren't suffice.

i wish i wouldn't catch my dad's flu. it'll be my second fever this month, if that happens.

i am now out of touch with the outside world. i haven't been able to update myself with the life of my friends. heck, i don't even know what DATE it is, if not for my new watch, which tells you what date it is (yay! i have a new watch! it glows in the dark too. and it has stars!)

the epilogue

2005-04-19T18:25:00.000-07:00

Graduation is kinda like the THE END cue on a story entitled "high school." And now, i am living the Epilogue. A pretty boring one, i should say, starting today. here's the rundown of what happened since last Friday:

Friday
Graduation and Grad Ball.
graduation: in all fairness, it wasn't as boring as i thought it would be; in fact, it wasn't boring at all. Must be because we were more unorderly than in any practice we ever had. Maybe because students know that teachers wouldn't scold them; not in front of the parents, not today. The guests' speeches were okay, unlike those done in our school, obviously read (they don't even try to memorize it), though some were laced with "pluggings" that clearly shout, "VOTE ME FOR THE NEXT ELECTIONS!" And when we went upstage to get our diplomas, about 3 guests asked where we lived. I guess that's what happens when you invite politicians to Public School events. Lots people didn't shake hands with our principal at the stage (we were supposed to, after we shake hands with the guests). I feel sorry for her, but just a little bit; she doesn't really treat us well, so i guess she just reaped what she planted. then, it's finished, after our last Alma Mater song. it's probably the last time i'll sing it. After we took some pics, my dad whisked us off...to Mang Jimmy's!

If you don't know what Mang Jimmy's is, it's kinda like a carinderia near my dad's office. that's where he and his buds drink sometimes. The food was okay, but i never thought i'd eat there. then, we went home, and i played the PC. I was waiting for my mom to tell me to get dressed, my mom was waiting for my dad to pick me up, my dad thought she knew that he can't. then, my cousins came...i arrived late for the grad ball. reaaally late. i arrived at the dining part. then, the dance, which was okay; it was kinda like the prom, only with a fewer attendees but more bummed people. Some were thinking about their friends, while to my dismay, i was stuck with people bemoaning about their nonexistent love life. they were at different levels of dispair that it was almost funny. then, we went home (man, am i boring). UP was strangely eerie. it was too quiet and too dark. but what do you expect? That was about 1:30 am.

Saturday
Swimming!
i woke up early, but my dad told me to sleep again, and i did, but he woke me up again after a few moments. i was a bit sluggish, but i texted people to ask them if they're going. Ron and Felix did, but they were hours late. Actually, EVERYONE was late, even the people who rented the pool with my dad. Because i was bored (and i was afraid my dad was going to do the i-didn't-spend-cash-for-you-to-mope-around-here speech), i went with my cosins and swam at the kiddie pool. more like the pubescent pool. The water's up to my chin. we were supposed to go to the other kiddie pool (the waist-high one), but there were other people there. we swam. my little cousin (let's call her "Judy." her true nickname stinks) dunked my other cousin (ate carol) every time she can. My other cousin (Ate janice. she's Judy'ssister, and both their nicks do not sound good) was teaching Judy to swim in between the throw-your-older-cosin-to-the-pool game. we occasionally go out of the pool, when we're hungry or the sun's too hot. the people trickled in slowly. My cusins who came yesterday before the grad ball came around lunchtime, and i went to the place i used to hang uot with Allen, the youngest (i used to go there for swimming lessons... until i became a dropout). Ate Janice called us, and told me Ron and Felix were already there. i found them near the videoke booth, eating with Joanne Macabagdal. They got along remarkably well, chatting like old friends. You won't even notice that that was the first time they ever talked. I swam again, this time at the kiddie pool, with Allen, whose mom let her (yeah, Allen's a girl. i don't know why it's her nick, since her name's Apple) finally swim. Ron and Felix followed, after Felix did a few rounds of singing. Joanne swam too, with her friend Jenny. Then Ashley strutted in the swimming area, looking girly. she wasn't allowed to swim, and i think we made her envious. She retreated to the resting place, where her mother was. we took a break from swimming, and that's when i noticed that my skin became darker. Cool, i'm tanned! =) we went swimming again, and Joanne was with us. Felix actually taught Ron how to swim. We went to the 5-feet part. it smelled funny (Ron reckons that it smells like a dog). Then Joanne talked about the Nestea dive that they did when they were little. Of course, Felix and Ron had to try it. and of course i didn't, because i never liked swimming until now, and i'm not going to risk on making it into a phobia. Ron's foot got caught at the gutter, but he survived. we chatted at the pool, which was fine and dandy for the three of them, since their heads still stick up the water; my arm hurted from hanging in the gutter. then, it was 5pm. Time to leave the pool and hit the showers. we changed clothes, and we resumed talking near Joanne's place. it was cool, until we got to the subject of transportation; Ron and Felix don't have any. fortunately, Mark Mauricio's mom offered to let them go with them. But then, there was also our problem; my family couldn't fit into our vehicle with all the utensils. In the end, my aunt and cousin walked home.

when we got home, i discovered that i have a fever. i was too tired to do anything except sleep, which i did, but made me miss Gilmore Girls.

Sunday
i recovered.

monday
i told my parents that my clearance wasn't finished yet, and they let me go to school. i met with Grae and Dia at Mcdonald's ("Mahuli, pangit!" grace told us). There was a strike, and my mom was afraid that i won't be able to catch a ride, so i left our house early. I didn't have trouble looking for jeeps, and i arrived early. Monmon and Jerjer (they're not twins) sat with me, then Felix joined us. The two were late (problems with transportation), but Grace was the latest. we teased her that she's ugly. hehe.. then meng and hannah came, but they went inside SM to call Trixie (she has all our clearance forms; we're dead if she doesn't come to school). Ron came, and was a little hurt that we didn't invite him to our rendezvous. I told him that it's because he told me that he'll go to school whenever he wakes up, and that might take a long time. after some scuffles (and a few squished hopes---mostly mine, because they won't let me order anything), we headed to school. there were surprisingly (for me) lots of people, and i was surprised to see Egi wearing her uniform. oops! i forgot to tell her that we're allowed to wear civilian clothing...some people had larger problems, though. like Humanities students, who have a really fussy teacher. she wants them to draw their adviser, and if it doesn't look like him/her,you're supposed to make another one.tsk. i finished my clearnce, and so did Ron and Grace. Dia didn't because her Journalism teacher didn't show up. We then ate lunch, after explaining to them that i have to take some medicines. we ate at Tokyotokyo, which was a bit pricey, but since it's one of our last times to hang out together, we decided to disregard the financial angle.we then parted ways, and ron, felix, and i waited for Ashley, Hannah, and the others. We were supposed to watch "finding neverland," but ashley doesn't like it, so i decided not to watch it even when she agreed to go with me. we then spent a long chunk of time staring at the billboard where they post the films being shown... we then unanimously decided to play at the arcade. then, my dad called...so ashley and i headed home, but we made a detour to National Bookstore, where Ashley read a little. i never knew that she was a slow readr, but she was. i met my dad at another bookstore, but it was closed, so we met at Robinson's.

today
my cousins, sans ate janice, went back to Tarlac. My grandma was left here. i spent the day playing FFTA, then watched LOTR. I really don't want to watch it, because the first time i did, it bored me (the blurry shots of fake VCD can do that to you), and besides, i don't want to look like those newly-converted `shippers who watch (mostly LOVE) a book/movie because it's popular. i kinda hate HP fans like that...i even started to not like it that much when the movie popped up. anyway, i watched the movie, and it was good. too bad the cut out the scene where that blond-haired elf-queen (forgot her name...) gave all of them gifts... and that part where Gimli and Legolas became friends (elves and dwarves loathe each other, in tolkienverse). hah! i actually remembered parts of the book! yay! the movie was really long though, so i just fast-forward the orc and dark-hooded-riders scenes. they scare me. hehe. =)

"An exit is just an entrance to another place," someone wrote at my autograph book. My Exit in High School's my Entrance to college. who knows what'll happen? will we stay in touch? will we still be friends? i hope so. It really hadn't sunk in me yet. It feels like just another summer. maybe i'm hoping i'll see them again, next schoolyear. but of course, that won't happen. i hope college goes well for all of us...

one day to go...

2005-04-14T14:19:00.000-07:00

lately, i have started to doubt the hinu belief karma. i used to like it; i mean,it's kinda like the christian "golden rule," only it has a wider berth. but nowadays...you do your physics activity by yourself, and your groupmates (whose only contribution is to ask, "tapos na ba?") get higher grades. you bug your research groupmates everyday about your project, and you're the only one to fail the subject. some of your classmates just copy their answers to quizzes from someone else, and they have higher grades. you try to be there when your friends are down, and they couldn't even accompany you to eat lunch. heck, they're too wrapped up on spilling their problems to you, but they never give a damn about yours. sometimes you just have to wonder why...

tomorrow's graduation. hooray!

countdown to goodbye

2005-04-12T20:11:00.000-07:00

three days `til Graduation! i think the jitters are only starting to settle in... i guess i'll miss high school. Not exactly Quesci, but the people, the experiences, and the memories. it's petty sad. i thought that i won't miss any of it, but once the "mami-miss kita"s and the "walang kalimutan"s and the "sign ka sa autograph book ko"s have finally settled at the xientian's minds, i finally realized that four years is a long time...and the memories gathered from it is pretty big. oh well. enough of the reminiscing.

last week was pretty busy; i've been going to different places almost everyday. there was the retreat, the clearance, the senior's night (which i did not attend to, but watched a litle bit), the trip to our almost-new house (my cousins and i prefere the house next to it, but since my dad will buy the house, he vetoed our votes), Ma'am Al's birthday party, and the trip to UPEPP. my dad was also in a good mood (plus he ha money) so he treated us to different restaurants.

today, as usual, we had practice, but now it's for our thanksgiving mass. Yes, we had to practice a mass, mostly because our administrators are two-faced (well, it's true; i mean, what do you call people who painted and fixed our school for some hotshot guests, and not for the welfare of the students? they like to impress outsiders, but in reality, it's the pits) and wanted us to be presentable for the parents. we walked.we stood. we were bored. some used their time constructively by writing on autograph books that seemed to have mushroomed over the weekend. the rest chatted (a scientian's favorite pasttime). Since my left-side seatmate was signing an autograph book, and the one on my right seemed to have a mild migraine, i opted on listening about my other classmate's sordid tale. it was partly a love story, with a nasty ending that i really do not want to happen to me, though it ended pretty well. it was sad...huhuhu... that's when i realized that i'll miss my batchmates. like my classmate; i'll probably never hear about her love life again. sigh. then afterwards, after we chased some teachers and pestered them into signing our clearance (mine's almost finished, i think), i had a really late lunch at mcdonald's with grace and the others. we only sat there the remainder of the afternoon, first signing autograph books, then laughing at everything. i dunno. we laughed when ashley told us about her APE (advanced placement exam, but felix mistook it for ape, and made monkey gestures and sounds. we do that everytime we go near ashley). we laughed when alvin asked who the french friy maskot is (there weren't any. i think he's talking about a Jollibee mascot). we laughed at Alvin's drawing (actually, we were arguing on what it was. we settled on "tortured bat whose wings were cut off"). we laughed at almost everything. hehe. we were pretty boisterous, but it's a normal sight at mcdonald's, our school's unofficial annex. that's where everyone celebrates their mini-victories, from the start of the schoolyear to an early dismissal. It's also where we drown our sorrows away.it's filled with students in checkered blouses and navy blue slacks every schoolday, and on weekends, when you see teenagers in large packs, mostly talking and rarely eating, it's bound to be students meeting their classmates or friends. i guess that's one of the things i'll miss. i also like rainy days, where we desperately await the announcement of the suspension of classes because there's already a flood inside our school. oh well. those are the things that'll only retain in my memory...though weirdly, UPEPP students' fave hangout is Mcdonald's, and on rainy days, the flood enters the school...looks like i'll be at home.

the aftermath...

2005-04-07T10:55:00.000-07:00

i need money. neopets money, i mean, though real money's avoiding me too at the moment. *sigh* i'm sooo broke! i should've gone to school so i'd have allowance, but i'm trying to escape my problems...even for just a moment. besides, i kinda miss my house. i'm always rushing off to school (nowadays i'm always late),so nnow, i'm taking my time to relax and unwind. and sleep (i haven't had proper sleep this week). besides, this day is rather complicated. i'd rather run for cover. and of course, i haven't memorized our grad song (the oh-so-boring "ngayon," though its chorus is fun. we kinda sing it at the top of our voices).

the retreat was fun, i guess, but i didn't "see the importance of the retreat," as my dad wanted to. my roommate's egi and roxanne, and we spent our free time playing cards, taking pictures of ourselves, exploring, and...i forgot. i also hung out with monique and her roommates and alea, and babylyn (is the spelling correct?), and felix and alvin. the food's okay too. and we wathed this video, but it was cut off because we were running out of time. it was cool, though.it was about this guy with no hands, and he does everything you usually do with your hands with his feet. he even ate his hamburger with it (that was the part where our whole room became astounded. grossed out, more like. but that was the part that i decided that he's my idol!). and he paints better than me, using his feet. cool!we had a mass at the end of the retreat. then we went home.

i went to school yesterday, and i was late. i arrived at the part where we sing, and mrs. lomibao found out that less than half of the batch memorized the song. we wrapped up the practice at 11 am, but weren't allowed to go home, so we just stayed at the canteen for about three hours. we then went to mcdonald's (i still did not get my clearane. my dad's fixing it now. the adage "the squeeky wheel gets the oil" applies perfectly to him) and ate. then we went to SM (in an unflattering way), and hung out at National Bookstore. I then went home, but the others went to the arcade, i think.

retreat nah!

2005-04-03T00:03:00.000-08:00

it's our retreat tomorrow. yay! this is the first time that my parents let me. well, not counting the one in fourth grade, becuse we just slept in school. we'll stay somewhere for 2 days and 1 night. it's also senior's week tomorrow.

nothing too productive happened last week; thursday: we just went to school, got shooed away by our loving principal (sarcasm dripping excessively here), thus "forcing" us to take refuge at SM, where we played at the arcade and ate and chatted for hours. that's almost identical to friday. ate, went to school, ate (again), went to SM. Actually, i'm supposed to do my clearnace, but since the clearance forms aren't released yet, there wasn't anything to do there. then, my dad went to school, and used most of our time complaining to tata mads about the school administration's incompetence (actually, he was shouting for all the world to hear. it was funny, really, as mr. madriaga's part of the inept crew). then mr. bacabc came, and he and my dad had a little argument (more like a shouting match), and we went home. i told my dad that i was top 19 in our class; he wasn't happy. i bet he'll be more upset when he sees my actual grades...

oh boy...

2005-03-29T13:29:00.000-08:00

i am sooo~ dead.

really.

the only good thing about this is that i'm allowed to graduate, though my adviser's tone of voice isn't very reassuring.

you see...i flunked Research! of all the things to happen, it's this! what a way to end my high school life. oh, and i failed physics for the fourth quarter. 81%. Luckily, my physics average managed to grip to 86%. in Research, i got an 84%. just as i was moaning and griping about it, Ms. Alvarez (aka Mamal)glanced at us (Ron and I, since we were the only ones who went to her to ask for our grades), asked for myaverage, and informed me that i'm still qualified for a diploma. i guess it's all fine and dandy, but my dad's going to kill me as soon as he finds out. well, at least my card's staying with us for a weekend (ideally, i'll get it on a friday). i have to submit it at my new alma mater at the last monday before graduation.

things bugging me:

1. the above-mentioned final grades

2. my leather shoes (lost them 2 weeks ago. i just found out i lost them last sunday. i used my cousin's old pair, and they gave me this really big blister under my heel)

3. my new school (it's far, far away. i've never lived anywhere else except for QC)

4. my temporary house (my dad is planning on not giving me a TV set. so i can "concentrate better" on my studies. with my failing grade, i don't think i can convince him otherwise)

5. this stupid pool party my dad's dragging me after graduation. you wanna come? i could use your company...

oh well.

yesterday i went to school. i was late, but managed to be in the class and batch pictures. that was the highlight of my 3-hour stay in school. we were allowed to go home by lunchtime, but we decided to go at mcdonald's first. i was with ron and egi, and we saw felix and alvin there, and we decided to sit with them. then, we went to SM and had a stopover in National because ron wants to check something out. egi and i started playing with magic balls (you ask a question, shake a ball, and it'll answer. i asked: "magagalit ba ang tatay ko sa grades ko?" it answered "yes." thrice).then we headed to club synergy and sang at the videoke booth. we saw a couple of our batchmates there. i sang 2 songs. i i got a 98 and 100 (yay! i sing really horribly, and one time when we were singing in grade school, one of my friends asked me why i was always off-key). alvin, egi, ron, and felix sang too. felix is the best singer among us, but unfortunately, the mic turns off by itself, and felix didn't have a score. then, i raced with alvin (i lost twice) and played dance mania with egi (i got an F). egi played with felix and alvin played by himself and i just sat down and watched egi and felix and saying "yay!" to alvin whenever he beats his opponents, though i'm never sure he wins until the screen says "you win!". ron went home already (dentist appointment, i think).

then we went home. the rest was a blur, and nothing exciting happened today.

i wish it rains. it's sooo hot!

kapareho ko ng tadhana

2005-03-27T18:38:00.000-08:00

happy easter!!! just came back from tarlac. i don't know what to type...so i'll just post this article i found while surfing (misery loves company, as they say).

(from peyups.com)
Biyaheng Peyups : The Results
Contributed by lagsh (Edited by karl)
Tuesday, February 18, 2003 @ 01:56:21 AM

We arrived at the labyrinth-seeming campus and I was observing everything I learned from the pamphlet that my brother has lent to me. Ikot Jeepneys, Sunken Garden, Ang Bahay Ng Alumni, Oble, early morning joggers, and Kalayaan. I was not alone in my fascination. My company too were pointing at every feature of the university that we only had the chance to visualize through pamphlets and MGB's Halloween features.

So we finally found the Hostel Building where the contest was to be held. Because there were still few schools who have come, the non-participants decided to find the UPCAT results. Of course! February 7th was the date set for the test results to come out. My heart was blanketed with a cloak of warm and cold mixture of feelings. Excitement, fear, skepticism, and joy—I did not know what to feel. All I knew was that I took the examination for me to study in my dream school, UP, specifically UPD, for I want to finish schooling in an 'Iskolar' way.

After minutes of circling the complicated roads, proudly stood the Palma Hall. Chills ran my spine as I knew that the results were only dwelling inside, as I could already see a number of people crowding and looking at a number of boards, probably finding a certain name. We stepped down the van as we saw the vandalisms of expressions on the pavement on our foot. Moving forward, my shoes were moving faster.

While trekking the path towards the significant information, a father passed by talking with someone on the phone telling the recipient, "Wait-listed pa siya."

That captured me somehow. Still, I proceeded with excitement towards the semi-sweaty people who endlessly patrolled the area to check their names and the names of the ones they know. I, myself, joined their group and tried to find my name and the school I was allowed to be admitted in.

"Saan na ba yung letter L?" I asked to myself.

After seeing the passed and wait-listed students under letter E on the first board, I shifted to the next board. Laxamana Jason Paul Calma was the name I was carefully searching for while contending with the other people who were also finding names under different alphabets.

"Lapuz..." I was close to L.

"Lim..." Oops! A little too forward. (I have a classmate who is a Lim, whose name I did not see in the list, meaning that he failed.)

After browsing over a couple of Lim students variously destined to study at Los Baños, Manila, and Baguio, I saw the precious, official name of mine.

"Laxamana Jason Paul Calma," I read.

Yeah! I passed! That was the moment for me to feel like a Scholar. Again and again, I looked at my name. It may sound absurd, but I looked at the names of my classmates and interschool pals after and then returned to the sight of my name to double the surety. However, I was only half-happy with a smile, for deep inside from the very beginning of my dream, I knew that I would pass UP. I quickly got my cell phone off my bag and sent a text message to my parents, saying that I passed.

But why was I only half-joyous? It was because I was still unsure if UPD was my destination. Remember, my dream institution?

Proceeding, I read the name of the school I passed along with my course.

"Pampanga," it presented, followed by the code which literally meant BS Psychology. I was admitted through my second choice in the form that I filled up long ago. The smile I was wearing bent weakly, as the pride that enveloped my form suddenly lowered its banner. Disgust and questions hovered me while I dwelt in space in confusion.

I was half-happy, and will be forever half-happy. Bye-bye, Diliman. No more Ikot, Toki, etc. Those were my first thoughts after the impression. Yes, I was already thankful that I passed UP, but to only qualify for Pampanga seemed to be a manifestation of shattered dreams.

I felt anger. Yes, I was angry with I didn't know who. With myself? Probably. Why did I let myself be dumb enough to not pass a university that suits my eternal liking? With the UPCAT people? Well, I can't blame them, as they only do their respective jobs. With the Almighty? I'm not that close-minded to blame Him for something He's innocent with! With my school? Well, partly, for I believe that they should have a better curriculum for them to help us pass tests such as the UPCAT. Even the topnotchers from our school failed to pervade Diliman, while other educational institutions conquered the lists. With fate? No. I finally found relief when I just concluded that there are still other great things to unfold for little me. But still I was negatively dumbfounded and disappointed.

Not that I possessed objections for the results, but I really wish to study there!

Just as I was thinking the said things over and over, I heard a boy shout softly on his cell, announcing, "Yes! Oo, pasado ako! Diliman! Business Management!"

Jealousy began to infest me. Lucky that boy. He will be in the good arms of wisdom there at UPD. His face showed that personification of Nirvana which I longed to have concerning the results. Then, my attention was grabbed by a mother who was cautiously finding a name.

She then told her companion with excitement and happiness, "Hay! Tatlo na ang Iskolar ko sa Diliman. Salamat naman!"

I sighed and smiled faintly having emotions of envy and bliss for others' fates. They all have reached their dreams in my opinion, and me, I'm just dumped here in Pampanga.

We exited the hall as I tried to convince myself to be satisfied with my fate. Brilliant! I am only Rank 22 in class among 48 pupils, and I am one of the less than 10 students who passed, all in UP Pampanga. I should be thanking God.

As we were making our way home, passing by the Sunken Garden where the cadets marched, my mind was still in a state of anarchy. I regret, and then thanked God. I felt sad, and then I felt proud. Even the dogs that walked by, I noticed.

"Buti pa ang mga asong ito, kahit walang alam, nakakapasok dito sa Peyups."

And then I saw Metro Aids and Janitors.

"Mag-janitor na lang kaya ako para at least nasa UPD ako?"

They all sounded foolish after realizing myself in a condition of disorder. I convinced myself that I could be great in my own way.

From this experience which I cannot alter anymore, I have learned something. In your high school, never study through a memorize-these-terms type of strategy of being in the top. Instead, know the lessons by heart—that you will know them and comprehend them fully. This is what I usually try to do, but I easily give in to leisure. That probably was the reason why I passed UP Pampanga though I'm only a Rank 22 stude.

Still, I have a chance of touching my future visualizations of studying in Diliman. What I need to do is to get a 1.75, and I could transfer to Diliman. This will be a challenge to me now: to get that high grade for me to continue my dream.

Peace of mind at last is the result after seeing those mind-voodooing results. Oble, expect me there. Here I come!

save...me...

2005-03-21T13:27:00.001-08:00

nooooooooooooooooooo! i don't wanna gooooooooooooooo! (hey, that rhymes!) oh well.
holy week. my most dreaded week of the whole year. well, second for christmas, maybe. you might ask what the root of my revulsion is. well, it's only one word: tarlac. why? because it sums up many of my most abhorred things, namely:
long travel (fieldtrips are exceptions)
heat
yellow light
ash-covered floors
flies
absence of light in a room (bathroom, in this case)
noisy, nosy kids
noisy, nosy grown-ups
termite-infested furniture
flea infested dogs...at its worst

and other stuff that i cannot remember due to the fact that my cousins are bellowing at each other and i can't hear myself think. we're leaving in to days. sunday is my redemption. come to think of it, easter's the only sunday that i like.

too tired to tell all...

2005-03-18T19:23:00.000-08:00

this day is sooo tiring! this week, actually. thank goodness it's friday; i don't think i can carry on with this lifestyle for another day. i mean, i almost got lost while commuting because i suddenly dozed off on the FX. adding to the strain is my eternally-heavy backpack, which contains the books i have to suddenly lug home (we have to clean our room for clearance day, and we have to get rid of our things pronto). this is the first time in months that i'm using a backpack, and i look like a dorky freshman (not that i look like a sophisticated senior or anything, but i greatly improved over the summer; at least i don't look too much like a pre-pubescent,hauling my whole locker at my back day in and day out).

back to the clearnces: yay! it's finished! or so i hope. before i went home (or more accurately, went to the mall. hehe...), our class wa having a tiny problem about our room... it seems like we have to wall clocks and two doorknobs missing. i don't think anything resmbling a wall clock had ever graced our classroom this year. or two doorknobs, for that matter. the all clock is rather forgivable, but TWO doorknobs?! you see, our room has only one door...and we also lack a mirror (our room doesn't have a mirror; our classmates often "borrows" our neighboring section's mirror). with all those missing things to fill up, my classmate's been calling it the "imbento-ry" (taking a play on the word inventory and imbento).

oh well. speaking of inventories, why don't i do a clearance day inventory of my own? let's see...

-"la vie en rose" concert: check
(aka, the humiliate-yourself-in-front-of-your-french-classmates-and-their/your-friends concert. it went okay, i guess; my grade is B+)

-sing to Mrs. Lmibao: check
(more humiliating; she told me that i sound as if i'm reciting a poem. i got a 92, though, beacause she's on a good mood)

-collection of 20 mineral bottles:check
(i had to beg and buy some frm various people. *gasp!* i haven't paid Grace yet!)

-filipino notebook: check
(thank goodness! my notebook was confiscated by another teacher, you see. long story)

-dance waltz: uh..oh...
oh noooooooooo! i think it's our project! oh well. it's useless to cry over spilled milk. the only knowledge i have of it is that it's part of the title of a gundam movie, though up to this day i don't know what the connection of waltz is to a bizarre war anime flick.

my hands're tired from typing this.

oh yeah, some random bits:
-Ms. Alvarez's (Ma'amAl to her advisory class---that's us!) birthday's on april 8, next to my friend egi's (april 9); she told us that she'll serve spaghetti and cassava to us (philippine inside joke;it seems like food poisoning's the new cool thing nowadays, and the said food are the cause of these poisonings)

-yuck! went on a false alarm mall sale. i thought they have a sale in SM North---it turned out to be in SM Fairview. we went anyways, and had a fab time window shopping and losing in car racing.

okay that's it; bye!

a happy holiday...or so it seems

2005-03-13T20:14:00.000-08:00

at last, after ten months, i can return to the idle lifestyle i can only afford in summers; our finals are finished! final exams, i mean. now i can nap, surf the net, watch DVDs, and read at my heart's content without my conscience bugging me about a project/quiz/assignment of sort to be finished.umm...well, not exactly, but still! half of my problems are over; the finals were over yesterday, i already have a school for college (time flies by too fast...1 month to go til graduation), and ummm...i'm not grounded in anything! i usually am, by the way, from reading (most parents do anything to make their kids read, but does my dad realize that? nooo!) to eating at mcdonalds (huh?)

sadly, not everything's all right in the world. there's my research subject---i NEED to get at least an 89% to pass (the passing grade in my school's 85%; i only passed once this schoolyear, and it was an only an 85), then my projects in other subjects (most of them are to be passed on tuesday). i have to sing in two subjects (one's in French, to be sung with a fench accent, and the other's in Tagalog, in this really boring tune that sounds suspiciously like the song we sung at my grndfather's funeral. and it's supposed to be our graduation song),and we have two more long tests in math, and our final exam in french. and other minor skirmishes that i hope will turn out properly.

for someone who doesn't take her studies seriously, my academics is the main factor of my existance, it seems, since high school. i hope this will all end happily. i don't want my high school life ending with me grounded because i failed my subjects. am i making sense? i never seem to.